Escape the ”Either/Or” Mindset: Why Embracing a “Both/And Lifestyle” Helps You Have It All

Hey, my friends! I’m Hayley Hobson and I’m so glad you’re here! Welcome to the 10/10 Podcast where I help ambitious women, like you, look + feel younger, so you can achieve a 10/10 lifestyle (and unlock financial freedom).

You guys… summer is literally a week away.

It’s my fav season, did ya know?

This year, I have a super clear vision of what I want that to look like.

AND I’m super dedicated to making it happen.

Something happened during my last Spring Break and it reminded me that I get to decide how I use my time.

I get to make choices that align with that vision.

So today, I’m gonna break down for ya what that looks like for me… and ask you to think about what YOUR vision for your summer is.

Which, actually, can apply to your entire life.

What’s kinda funny is, my daughter Madeline handed me an unintentional wakeup moment.

We were at Sephora (because obviously) and she held up two lip glosses she wanted to get.

I said, “You can have either this one OR that one.”

And she goes, “How about BOTH/AND?”

First of all, hilarious.

Secondly, I’ve told you she’s a master negotiator, right?

I love that she’s learned to not just accept what’s being offered to her—even at the detriment of my credit card. LOL

But thirdly… this “both/and” idea really woke me up to more than just lip gloss.

And yes, she got both. LOL

Anyway, last spring break, I was super frustrated because I got soooooo caught up in the hustle of my biz that I barely spent any time having fun or connecting with my fam. 

Seriously, it was nuts.

I realized later… I had bought into this “either/or” story.

I could either have fun…

OR I could grow my biz.

And ya know what?

Looking back now, I recognize that that mindset—and that situation—was totally NOT aligned with my vision for my life.

But I was so focused on the details of my days that I went into psychological assessment.

And my vision kind of fell away.

Does that ever happen to you? You get so busy DOING that you forget about BEING.

So this summer, I’m taking Madeline’s (and my own leadership) tip and cultivating a BOTH/AND mindset.

I get to be successful AND have fun.

HOW do I do that?

Well, first of all, I’m prioritizing + pre-planning my days better and literally time blocking everything into my calendar before a trip or a slate of fun activities…

So I CAN do it all. 

The BOTH/AND mindset means thinking a little further ahead.

You get to strategically carve out time and take committed action to make it happen.

For example, let’s say you’re a multi-passionate person, like me.

Or, let’s say you have a full time job that pays the bills… but it doesn’t tick all the fulfillment boxes for you.

Maybe you have creativity you wanna express but you punch numbers for a living.

Maybe you have a writer’s heart but your job doesn’t offer you that outlet.

Maybe you’re a crafting genius but you work at a computer all day.

Make you have a ton of experience and wanna monetize it by teaching other people how to do something you’ve mastered long ago.

These are all examples of being multi-passionate.

Examples of having BOTH a stable job… AND the ability to earn some extra cash while fueling your passion.

AKA: Creating your own side hustle.

Now, before you go, “Ugh, who has the TIME???”

Lemme let ya in on a little fact.

How you prioritize your time and where you spend your time, energy, and attention is up to you.

Don’t buy into the BS that someone else dictates it and that you “HAVE TO” do something.

You may feel obligated to… but the decision is ultimately yours.

For most people, the idea of a side hustle is super appealing.

‘Cause you get to indulge in your passion projects WHILE staying steadfast in your primary responsibilities.

It feels exciting (because it’s a “passion project”)—not oppressive or overwhelming, like the thought of completely revamping your life might.

So to help you with this, I put together a really great guide about how to start your own side hustle.

Your complimentary copy is waiting for you at

In the meantime, let’s get more into this BOTH/AND lifestyle… and how you can do this too.

The key to living your best BOTH/AND life… is to be intentional with your time.

As in, setting an intention of HOW you want to spend your time… and WHY.

The fact is, no matter how many techniques I hand you—or you try out on your own…

Without a clear intention, you’re gonna keep spinning your wheels.

Because you’ll keep moving things around on your calendar—and in your LIFE—and never stop procrastinating.

Or, you’ll just live in a complete state of overwhelm.

Being INTENTIONAL with your time is what makes the difference between whether these techniques work for you.

And whether you see the results you desire.

So, one way you get to be intentional about time is by using time blocking…

This is a simple technique where you literally add blocks of time to your calendar for specific things.

Think of the blocks like buckets. 

They’re just waiting to be filled with the things you get to do. 

Grocery shopping. Content creation (yes, Madeline and I literally block out the time to create our reels and Tiktoks together). 

Doctor’s appointments. Writing emails. Exercise. Quarterly tax prepping (yep, that’s coming up at the end of this month, too).

Everything in your personal life AND your biz goes into a bucket.

So how do you get started?

Well, you start by mapping out your recurring or non-negotiable appointments or activities.

Maybe it’s a standing appointment you have for work. Like a weekly meeting or zoom.  

Or maybe it’s something for your kid… a camp or volleyball practice. 

For me, daily exercise is one of my non-negotiables. 

So is creating a block of time to spend with Madeline every week. Even if it means I end up with a whole bunch of stuff from Sephora I don’t need. LOL.

So, you’ll make your list of all of these non-negotiable, standing appointments you do during the week.

And this list goes onto your calendar before you add anything else to it.

These are what I like to think of as your Big Rocks. 

The big, important things go in first… so they ALWAYS have a spot.

Now… a word of caution: do NOT include things like groceries, errands, etc. 

These are NOT your Big Rocks.

Yes, they may be must-do, but WHEN they happen is negotiable. 

So once you add the non-negotiable, standing, or RECURRING appointments you have regularly onto your calendar… 

You’ll notice there’s still space around the Big Rocks.

So next, you’re gonna think about how to start filling that in – with what I consider to be Little Rocks.

Those are the important – but flexible – activities.

Some examples of things that could fall into the Little Rock category are:

  • Family doctor, dental, or orthodontist appointments.
  • Chiropractic adjustments.
  • Massages or bodywork.
  • Cleaning.
  • Yard work.
  • Getting a mani/pedi.
  • Or a bikini wax (it is summer after all).
  • Getting your hair done.
  • Sephora runs. Obviously. LOL.
See how they’re flexible – but important? 

They may also be recurring – but they don’t absolutely need to take place on Thursday at 3pm like your Big Rock of picking up your daughter is.

So the next step of time blocking is to write your list of Little Rocks.

When you do that, I’ll bet you’ll realize there are several things on that list you could automate.

As in, use technology to take care of that for you. 

Or at least make your life way easier.

For example, cutting back on shopping time by using Amazon’s Subscribe and Save program, where household items are autoshipped to you on a schedule you determine.

BOOM – you just got back 2 or 3 hours a week!

The third part of this process of creating a BOTH/AND lifestyle is to follow the blocks.

Yep, it’s called discipline, my friends, and it’s how you get to have BOTH fun AND success.

Pay attention to your calendar… and follow the blocks.

Don’t let tasks bleed over into the next block.

Instead, add another block onto your calendar. 

Or take a block away from your calendar that isn’t a priority for today or this week.

Or, if you notice you’re continually bumping up against a block and getting frustrated… make that block longer going forward.

Time blocking is FLEXIBLE. And you get to make it your own.

So let me ask you…

What would your BOTH/AND lifestyle look like?

How committed are you to having BOTH fun AND success in your life?

I really encourage you to think about this.

And literally unhook yourself from the EITHER/OR mindset.

Get creative.

Look for new solutions.

Be committed to having it all.

And align your actions to your vision.

This summer, I’m 100% committed to having both fun AND growing my biz.

And I’m shifting my approach to align with this – by literally scheduling fun. LOL

I know that sounds weird, but essentially, I’m changing the hierarchy of where I put my free time.

Madeline is entering high school next year… and I’m fully aware that one day, she may not want as much mom time as she does now.

So I’m taking full advantage of this summer with her to be present and engaged.

WHILE building my biz.

And to accomplish this vision, I decided to make changes both in my biz – and in my time blocking system… in order to create the white space I desire. 

You get to do this too.

Like, let’s say you’ve thought about creating your own side hustle for a LONG time.

Well, my friends, the stars have aligned for you.

‘Cause I’m handing you my step-by-step guidebook on how to start one RIGHT NOW at

And, because I want this BOTH/AND lifestyle for you, I’ve made it free for a limited time.

Alright, that’s it for me today, friends – I’ll see ya online…

And maybe at the beach!

LOL Bye!