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How to Ask For What You Want to Make Your Biz Dreams Come True

When I go to Wonder, one of my favorite cold-pressed juice shops in Boulder, I don’t stand in line hoping the dude behind the counter can read my mind.

I don’t beat around the bush, passive-aggressively, hinting that I want a turmeric ginger shot.

I straight up ask for it.

And damn, is it good. ;)

Asking for what you want in your life and biz is the key to making your dreams come true.

Are you trapped behind a wall of excuses?

So many peeps are.

It’s hard to move forward when those excuses form a chain that’s wrapped around your feet, keeping you from taking action.

I know what it’s like to ask for what I want.

When I first had the thought that I wanted to build an online biz, I knew I had a lot to learn.

Social media tips, marketing strategies….it was going to take some time and money to invest in courses I needed to take like B-School.

In order to take the next step and start school, I had to ask my family for help.

I asked Madeline if she could allow me the time to pursue my dream.

I asked my husband, Wes if he could support me in regards to the financial investment I needed to make in order to take the course.

If I never asked, I never would have/could have done it. And it was a very instrumental step on my path to success.

Also, thank you fam jam! I friggin love you!

It can be so difficult to ask for what we want in life, from our families, at work, in our businesses…

Maybe you think you’re being a burden, or you’re overwhelmed or under-appreciated. And you’re probably not saying boo about it.

Girl, it’s time to kick those feelings to the curb and stand up for what you want and need. 

We’re all caught up in our own shiz.

Everyone has their own needs and wants and if no one ever stood up and straight up asked and went for what they want, this world would be full of zombies.

No one is a mind reader so don’t assume your colleague knows you need help completing a project.

Or your sister in law knows you need help with the kids because you’re sick.

Or your husband knows you need a self-care day because you’ve been burning the candle at both ends looking after the kids and working your butt off.

ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. 

Do it. I dare you.

And just watch as things start to change.

Don’t worry, I’m here to help you learn how to ask. Because it can be hard at first.

But practice makes perfect.

Tip #1: Don’t let fear stop you from asking

This is a big one.

It can be a little scary to ask for what you want.

Maybe you’re scared that you won’t get it.

Maybe you’re scared that once you get it, you won’t want it anymore.

Or maybe you’re scared that once you get it, you’ll lose it.

Blah blah blah, shut yo mouth fear!

All these fears will just get in the way of what you want.

Always ask yourself — “What’s the worst that could happen?”

I guaran-freaking-tee that most of the time the worst thing that could happen ain’t that bad at all.

If you don’t try, your life will never change.

And instead of a turmeric shot, you’ll be eating raw ginger, which is hella good for you but not nearly as fun.

Tip #2: Be bold and specific in what you ask for.

Confidence is key my friend. 

First of all, KNOW what you want. Get specific.

Do you want your team member to get you edits on the latest marketing proposal “soon” or do you want them to hand it in on Thursday at 5:00?

Do you want your husband to “help you out”? Or do you want him to take your daughter to her ballet class tomorrow morning at 10 am so you can finish up an important task?

Get specific. And then….get bold.

Don’t get pushy or aggressive but be confident in your ask.

That confidence is contagious. It’s convincing. Because it’s genuine and powerful.

No one can read your mind. And no one is going to give you what you want if you ask for it in a whiny voice. 

And no one is going to pick up all your “hints”.

Be the strong independent bad ass biz woman you are!! Rowr!!!

Tip #3: Know what you don’t want

Knowing what you don’t want is just as important as knowing what you do want.

Hello boundaries, you’re looking fine as per usual!

Success in your biz is determined by those boundaries and what you are and are not willing to tolerate.

Is your web gal consistently late on deadlines?

Is your team member showing up to Zoom meetings late every day?

You have the right to let your colleagues, partners and teammates know your expectations.

And if you can’t ask them to get on the same page, they’ll just walk all over you.

Boundaries in your biz and your life are so critical for your happiness and success.

Again, conjure up that confidence chica.

Fake it ‘til you make it.

Stand up for yourself and go get ‘em!

Finally, we won’t always hear a yes when we ask for what we want.

And that’s okay.

Being gracious in hearing a no is just as important as the ask.

Don’t take it as rejection, accept it.

Move forward in a different way. Maybe that no is meant to take you down a different, even better path.

But you know what, at least you asked.

At least you went for it.

Because if you don’t ask, you won’t ever get.

There are so many people in our lives who want to help and support us if we just lean in and ask. And give back when the time is right.

What is the scariest thing you’ve ever asked for and how did it improve your life or biz? Let me know in the comments!


Comments (1)

Reply

Katie Taylor

Mar 19, 2019 10:16 PM CDT

Hi Hayley, thank you for your inspiring blogs. I'm now working closely with Jasmine Kratz in Australia on my website (3SS) and am part of Tara's downline. It is time for me really to step up & in to my own leadership. I'm getting my act together and will be following in your footsteps... I look forward to the day we meet too. THANK YOU for leading the way for people like me! Love, Katie x

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