A few days ago, I ran into a friend at Whole Foods. I had been standing in the check out line when she arrived, texting someone else. When she popped in line behind me I was excited to see her but realized after a moment that I had not stopped texting. We moved away from the checkout line and towards the parking lot to catch up for a few minutes and all I could think about was how rude I had just been. I guess I looked distracted because she suddenly asked, "Where are you?"
I was somewhere in the past and somewhere in the future, running back and forth between frequencies, delinquent in the present. It happens all the time. Staying in the present is hard. The past feels like an endless black hole constantly sucking me back while the future is this big bubble of wonders, wants, desires, hopes and dreams. I do many practices to keep me grounded in the present, but man, oh man, it's not easy. Staying present is like someone asking you to focus without blinking wandering.
Our minds are designed to go. Constantly. Here’s a perfect example. Since I sat down to write this blog, I’ve already checked Facebook messages and text messages twice and flipped to a website to work on another task. I simply can’t stay focused. It’s not that my wandering mind is necessarily a bad thing. Some call it multi-tasking. While I know personally I’ll get the blog done, so I’m not worried, I do want to find ways to stay more focused so that it doesn't take nearly as long. And in the situation with my friend at Whole Foods, I want to learn how to be there in the moment with her and with others. Don’t you? We all need to channel our wandering minds so that staying present becomes a little easier, especially in this new Age of Distraction we now live in.
Mobile devices, internet, TVs… its way too much. Here are some ideas to help you live more in the present moment when you find your mind wandering like a ping-pong ball?
1). Meditate If you haven’t tried this, meditating sounds uber-boring. The first time I tried it, I was like, “how am I going to sit her for 2 minutes and do nothing?” Yeah, 2 minutes! But then 2 became 5 and 5 became 10 and 10 easily became 20. But I get it. It’s hard in the beginning to sit there and think about nothing. Especially when you can fill all that quiet time up with distractions! Often times though, the hardest things we try to do in life reap the biggest rewards. Whether it’s getting grounded, steering your health towards the right path, losing weight or getting into shape. We don’t necessarily
want to take the steps but when we get there, we’re pleasantly surprised we did. Meditation works. Try it.
2). Practice listening I bet that most of the time you are listening you are not really hearing. Watch yourself and notice if you’re slipping into oblivion.
Tip: be easy on yourself as this is a skill you will need to build up to. It’s not like you can tell yourself to focus and viola, you’re focused. You will have to build an awareness practice so you can see whether you are on autopilot or whether you need to bring your presence back into the moment. You may end up constantly reminding yourself to come back, really listen and hear, but eventually you will be able to refine the skill.
3). Do Body Centric Work Some like tai chi, I like yoga and pilates of course. There are many practices that focus on the breath and keep you present. When your body and spirit are connected, it’s much easier to live in the moment. When you’re disembodied or disassociated, you’re disconnected. Disconnection has unfortunately become the norm in our society. We need to fix this. Focusing on our breath and our awareness through movement can help. Whichever one of these steps you decide to try, remember this mantra:
The past doesn't not own me. I am not my story. The future is in motion. Worrying or obsessing about it takes me out of the only real time I have to live, which is NOW. I have just given you 3 great tips to help you live in the present. In what ways do you get distracted? When do you notice it the most? I would love to hear from you. Please leave your comments in the box below. If you know someone who could benefit from this post, please share it with others. Post it on FB, Pinterest or Tweet it. XO, Hayley